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Our reason for this approach is/was credibility (ours). If we lied to them about Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc. then what else would we lie to them about? Jesus, God, Good vs Bad, etc.
I've asks each of them recently if they would have rather we make them think Santa was real and each has said they are glad we did it the way we did.
*places on flame retardant suite*
When our oldest daughter was two years old, we were out somewhere and I said, "Look, Lauren, there's Santa!"
"Dad," she responded (and the Dad was said with two syllables...you know, da-ad), "Santa's not RE-AL (again, with two syllables)."
"How do you know that?" I asked.
"I just know."
With that, our dealings with Santa were over.
* PS. I know what you meant. I am just playin'. Lying is just plain bad. If Jesus is The Truth, no lie can be good.
We have taught them about St Nick.
(I found out when I was 9...can you tell? I'm still a tad pissed about it.)
Our eldest would see Santa all over and understand it was a man dressed up as Santa. However, our second child does believe in Santa. It was too confusing for him to see Santa all over at the stores and it was easier to let him believe. Our youngest is freaked out by Santa so I don't know what that will do to her later on in life.
Our 11 year old finally approached me about it 2 years ago, and we had "the talk." I explained to her that it really is her mom and me, and that it's just for fun. Also, I stressed to her that she was not to say ANYTHING about it to her young siblings. Now she just smiles and plays along...and receives gifts from Santa too.
Yep, Santa is welcome at the Richardson home!
Peace.
We strive very hard to wrap Christmas all around Jesus Christ.
But to those who choose to do the whole Santa thing, no condemnation from me.
I just wanted to post with the word Santafication. because it's Christian-punny.
Wow! You totally fooled me into thinking this benevolent jolly man, whom I now love, was real for my entire life. Hilarious.
When I found out I was crushed. CRUSHED. And I felt duped. I really felt like an idiot. Not an experience I want to share with my girls.
That said, I have defaulted to my wife's position on this because I have no spine.
peace|dewde
Why do people not go to church?
Because the church they know about down the street doesn't allow their kids to trick-or-treat and holds a "fall festival".
When I was a kid and found out Santa wasn't real, I had figured it out already. I never waivered whether Jesus is real or not. Anyone who did had other issues bigger than finding out Santa wasn't real.
I don't think it "takes away" from Jesus unless you've done a really crappy job the other 11 months teaching your kids the importance of Jesus.
For the Kingdom,
Fred McKinnon
www.fredmckinnon.com
www.theworshipcommunity.com
We always read the Christmas story on Christmas morning before opening presents, and as for presents, our kids get three gifts from mama and papa, to symbolize the gifts Jesus received, and one from Santa, plus stockings.
my brother decided to carry on with this tradition as well. so i don't see myself starting any tradition that my nephews aren't doing.
My desire is that my God would be the same God to my kids...one that is powerful, on the move, and doing things that continually refute any doubt that He is indeed real. If I have to hash out similarities and differences between santa and God...I think I've missed the bus.
That seems to work.
There's a happy medium and it is the large majority of sold out for christ christians that fall in this category. You won't hear many of their voices on blogs though. They don't read them a whole lot.
When my kid actually asks about "the" question about Santa, we'll elaborate. Until them, St. Nick gets the credit for the stuff I buy.
That's the most judgmental thing I've ever heard about this issue. It's not a trendy "in" thing to do. It has to do with integrity. Something that most people, Christian and non-Christian, have a problem with in our culture. Side note: look up the stats on students who think cheating is ok.
Bottom line for me, my parents, and most Christians who CHOOSE not to do Santa: it's an integrity issue. I'd rather not knowingly lie to my kids. For ME, that also includes lying by omission.
For you, it may be different, you might see it as something totally different, and I respect that, but I would never enter the discussion and belittle others' opinions as fanaticism.
Do Santa, like I said no condemnation from me. But please don't judge those of us who choose not to as some form of brainwashed fanatics.
Peace.
Meant in peace & love -- not sarcasm and rotten attitude.
I would agree that there is a happy medium and we all have a responsibility to decide things for our kids that are well thought out, prayed about, and affirmed by others. But to state that people who don't do Santa are some hippy trippy jump onto the next trendy thing is just silly.
I'm not accusing anyone here of that. I'm just saying I've seen it A LOT the past few years. I think another reason for it is that people are so angry with the rampant materialism today they're lashing out at pop culture symbols and barring them from their households.
In the same voice people are saying here, "I won't lie to my kids, but I have no problem if you lie to yours... It's an integrity issue. I have integrity and it's ok with me that you don't." Yeah, that's not looking down your nose at people.............. I've felt it before at church when casually asking a parent, "so, what's santa getting the kids this year?" and the elitist reply, "oh, we don't do santa at our house".
Actually, it's not that big of a deal either way. This is turning into one of those arguments that's just silly and causes a pointless riff between folks. How I guide my children spiritually and socially is totally independent of whether or not santa is around during Christmas.
We will handle the tooth fairy, easter bunny, etc the same way. Our kids have tons of fun, LOVE making letters to santa and putting out cookies, etc. Might not be a perfect system, I don't know. I just feel like I was brought up in such a materisitic commercialized world and I want to avoid that if I can, and the truth is, I do think that kids don't understand reality and fantasy well, so we try to not let there be any confusion on what is real.
We have a 3 year old and "do" Santa, but will tell him the truth if he asks.
Our children's ministry run by my bride is hosting breakfast with Santa this Saturday. Last they had 500 families come to see Santa, have some donuts and hear the real Christmas story from the Pastor.
;)
Juvenile, I know. Sorry, couldn't resist.
No Santa at our house, pretty much for the same reasons already discussed here. I just don't want to risk telling my kids about Santa and Jesus, and then they find one of the two is not real. Especially when they see the world around them give more significance to the man in red than the Son of Man.
i dont ever remember thinking "well santa's not real, the tooth fairy isn't real, etc etc. so how can God be real?" i dont think a 5 yr old can really process that deeply.
plus its way easier to believe that Jesus is real... because HE IS real. santa isn't real, so it is kind of hard to believe all his extravagant made up stories that every family has a different version of.
My five year old could definately have that discussion with you of the difficulty of why Jesus is real even though we cant see them.
I think this is great because kids have really vivid imaginations and it can make for a ton of fun but at the same time the can handle that Santa isn't real.
When Santa & Jesus are people that you can't see and you find out that your parents have been lying to you about one it could set up a situation where you seriously wonder what else they are lying to you about.
Just kidding, we let the kids do the Santa thing, but Jesus is the main thing around our house at Christmas.
Sometimes I think the whole Santa thing is more for the parents than the kids.
I still smile at the memory of the clerks face being shut down by a 4 yr. old!
Just asking...
I guess I see it like it must be an individual parenting decision. Some kids are bent a certain way.
My kids see me praying and reading my bible everyday. I make sure they see that. The image of their father living a life of Christ should outshine Santa.
365 days a year of that should shape them well I hope.
We emphasize the Bible Story of Christmas, but like what I said on my other comment, we did Santa when kids were little :)
And yes, Jesus is first.
When kids was small they believed that Santa's legend. Now they know it's us who brings the "stuffings". Just the other day we read the story of St. Nick.
When there are small kids in the house, it's fun to do Santa. It's a Christmas tradition :). Teach the value of "giving :) and also let the kids be kids :)
This year my family morphed into elves as they decorated the Christmas tree. They are Santa's little helpers
http://www.amauiblog.com/2008/12/tree-is-up-elv...
Nor do I continue to harbor feelings of distrust for my parents or question the existence of God. I’m sure that there are exceptions to the rule, but my guess would be that most adults don’t base their belief in God on whether or not they were lied to about Santa- there are probably numerous factors that have played into their current belief system and Santa is not solely to blame.
Then I would start singing..."you better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout I'm telling you why..." Then stop abruptly at that part.
After a few days, I would say, that Santa isn't real but it's not because I killed him.
Having kids is gonna be awesome! :D
At this, my niece, about 6 said, "Silly, don't you know that Santa is like Jesus? He gives us presents because he's good, not because we are!"
So yeah. I pray that my toddler will believe in Santa.
1. It is fun!
2. To teach my kids to be generous and about giving.
3. Jesus is always going to be the center.
Saint Nicolas was only being obedient to God. So should we. Coca-Cola and Sears turned Santa into the marketing juggernaut he is now though...
The first time my daughter (3yo) saw him, she said, "Noah!"
'Cuz we're super-spiritual like that.
All joking aside though, I grew up with Santa (and the Easter bunny too) and I have to say I didn't "feel" this way, but I just can not lie to my children and lead them to believe in Santa (or the Easter bunny) and then tell them about the Truth of God and His Christ and not wonder if they would say to themselves, "Santa was a lie, The bunny was a lie. why should I believe in this God or His Christ? I bet Mom and Dad are lying now too. It sounds too good to be true, just like the other ones did.
I just can't do it.
My parents did Santa Claus with me, my two brothers, and my sister. And we're all grown and all involved in the ministry now and are dedicated Christians. I think I resent the idea that one day of "Santa Claus" can replace the 365 days you spend in the whole year emphasizing and teaching your kids about Jesus and his importance in our lives.
Ultimately it does boil down to a family celebration / tradition. Santa was one of ours. And we grew up quite normally.
S&(%.
Another reason we chose to disclude Santa, was I felt the message would get a little confusing later. we tell our children their is this Santa, or Easter bunny, or Tooth fairy and then when they get older we tell them, "We were just kidding...but their really is a Jesus!" That seemed scary to us.
Another reason is we just plain didn't want to lie to our children. We were willing to play Santa like we play Batman, or Spiderman...but our kids knew we were pretending.
And lastly the Story, "Twas the night before Christmas" really bothered me. Read it and see how many characteristics that are unique to God alone are in their. It seems a little to much like idolatry for us. So we excluded.
What we found most amazing was how many people got upset with us for not "playing along" we were in no way condemning to anyone, we even pretended with their kids so as not to violate the parents desires. But it is almost cultic this following of Santa.
My kids by the way are 27, 25, 24 and 9. None of them feel cheated for not having believed in Santa!
Blessings to all,
Randy
However, as I shared on your facebook, we didn't do a real good job of making some special anticipatory traditions in the place of that. I hope to make up for that now. My older kids have said they're glad that we didn't "do Santa". They've never ruined it for anyone else... but they do wish that we'd done other things.
to let our children know where the modern day idea of Santa came from because he is everywhere.
In reading all the comments I have three thoughts:
1. Call it what it is! Rather than saying do you tell your children about santa or not ... shoot the pink elephant and lets level with the truth...
Do you choose to lie to your children and how do you justify it?
2. the argument that I live Jesus all year long in front of my children so I can lie and it will all be o.k. this time doesn't hold water.
You wouldn't eat a cookie with a smidge of dog poop so why spiritually feed your children with a "small" lie at Christmas? Sure it's culturally and socially acceptable but I'm hungry for God's approval and in this culture I'm finding that good is the enemy of best.
3. Why do I have to tell my children they can't speak the truth? I don't want them to grow up afraid to speak the truth because they might offend someone.
I want them to be loving, kind, considerate but I constantly struggle with how we teach them to compartmentalize thier lives... Be bold, share your faith; but don't tell little suzie the truth about santa because it will offend her.
For children this is politics why do parents get so pissed at the truth?
I'm not talking about mean spirited children who want to hurt another child with the truth, I'm talking about sweet children who when asked say, " no I don't believe santa is real." and beware their parents will come and give you the run down after church for it... sheesh.
I guess it's clear... we don't dig santa
You know what though? We can figure this all out in heaven. Because regardless of how my family handles the "santa" situation, we'll spend eternity in the same heaven as the people who want to beat santa like a piñata with their holy sticks.
It's an interesting thought.
We did ask our Mom one time why Santa brought some kids a lot and some a little and she told us that tax time was when Moms and Dads paid Santa and the elves. She said Santa only brought what your family could afford and some families had to pay Santa on April 15th while others got some of their money refunded from last year. It tickles me now that I know...
BUT, you darn well better believe that the BEST gifts always came from Mom & Dad!! Santa can gets credit for a little gift and a stocking, but we get the hugs and kisses for the bigger stuff. :)
as a christian mom i also believe in the goodness of people and our power to change the world. i believe that people are good and sometimes tough times just cover the goodness like a blanket.
at our church, Flamingo Road Church in South Florida, we are set to change the world in 22 days with random, sincere and purposeful acts of kindess, joy and generosity. check out thegiftrevolution.com to read more about this. the site is filled with stories of kindess and joy.
wishing you and your beautiful family a very merry christmas.
may your hearts be filled with joy this holiday season.
all the best
jennifer
PS - totally love you ink - your sleeve looks amazing!!!!
Jesus is the reason for the season.
I don't lie to them, but I do keep them from spoiling other kids by telling them that is between the other kid and his parents.
I think we tend to celebrate what Santa represents rather then what he is.
My big thing is that I want my kids to be grateful:
Christmas Presents come from hard working parents who love their kids, not some fat elf in a red suit who jumps down chimneys! =)
We just keep it simple and try to deal with all the tears when we are buying other people the things she wants and she has to wait until Christmas. We like to bring up the story about Saint Nick and get them to think about giving to others and helping other people feel good.
I just think we are asking the wrong question
I'm actually a non-stir it up, run from conflict person
so it was great to let out years of frustration
sorry if I didn't live up to my name in my earlier post :-)
So many people in the comments talked about feeling upset when they found out that Santa wasn't real. Even some of the pro-Santa folks said that. That's unfortunate and unnecessary.
One other thing I noticed is that many of the people who don't pretend Santa is real seemed to have really well thought through reasons, and the people that did "do Santa" seemed to have more of a "why not" type of approach.
My kids were upset when they found out My Little Ponies didn't actually exist. They're kids! And that's okay. They got over it eventually and moved on to the Smurfs.
It's not that we have so much of a "why not" approach as we think sometimes the controversy gets blown out of proportion. I have heard several people people say they were upset (making it sound like they were actually traumatized) and that they didn't like perpetuating lies to their children (I do believe make believe is harmless). To say there IS a right approach and there IS a wrong approach IS wrong. Parenting styles are different and I believe it's best to just respect each other's varying styles.
Have you thought about how or when you will have that conversation with them about Santa?
I think I'll tell them about Santa but probably not hype it up. Maybe show him more as the spirit of giving at Christmas than as the reason for it. That way some of the fun Christmas magic is still there but it's not the core reason for it.
I am not into telling my kids to believe in things that can't see that aren't real (i.e. Santa, Tooth Fairy, etc) because I wonder if they will (consciously, subconsciously) lump God into that category too. Anyway, we tell them Santa stories, and watch Rudolph, but we give and receive gifts from each other, not from the fat man in red. That's my 2 cents worth.